I’m so furious right now.

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satehen
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I’m so furious right now.

Post by satehen »

I feel like I have no one to talk to about this right now. My best friend is in hospital and my other friend who I could talk to is dealing with her mother’s cancer diagnosis. So please excuse me while I rant on here but I am f**king furious.

DH went out last night to see a band, he took today off to recover from the inevitable hang over. He had one job, take our son to school. I made sure his phone had the alarm on it and before I left I put an additional alarm on my iPad. I found his phone on the stairs and put it by the bed.

At 8am I text to check he was up. No reply. I called but got a message to say he was on another line. When he hadn’t replied by 8:30, the time he should have left for school I called again and again message to say he’s on another line. I called the house and it rang through. At 9 am I text, no reply, called mobile and house, no reply. Kept texting and calling throughout the morning, getting increasingly worried. I text his dad who lives 5 minutes away and got no reply. Called his parents home phone and despite his mother being bed bound so definitely at home, no reply. In shere desperation and worry I contacted the school to ask if my son was there, he wasn’t. They tried ringing house and mobile, no reply. As a last act before giving up and driving an hour from work, I text his brother who called him and said he was ok.

I’d sent text after text throughout the day, send DS in, school are expecting him etc. At around 1pm I had a message from DH to say he was sorry, but slept through the alarm and couldn’t get to his phone in his pocket! Followed by a message to say how amazing the band were and a load of videos. Don’t even get me started on the last part. He lied to me, his phone wasn’t in his pocket, it was at the side of the bed.

Got home to be greeted by my excited son still in his pj’s having had an unexpected day off school. I’ve had to email the school to apologise for the unauthorised absence. DH hasn’t dared to show his face to me. I’m so f**king furious. I spent the morning frantic, worrying why he hadn’t picked up, if something serious had happened, if my son was ok and on top of that he lied about his phone with a stupid lie about not being able to physically get his phone out of his pocket. WTF?! Sorry to rant, but I don’t feel like I can talk to anyone in RL right now and I’m so very angry.
And all that there is, is the absolute ugliness of being human. And you’ve got to love it. Or else you’re f**ked.
Ripley
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Re: I’m so furious right now.

Post by Ripley »

I can only speak from my experience and I don't know the full story but listening to this, I would be pretty furious too.

I think you have to try and talk about what happened and give the other party a chance to explain. I find facing things head on, no matter how hard is the way to deal with things. Don't avoid the elephant in the room.

Trust has obviously been broken in a big way and it made you worry what had happened, and if they are genuinely sorry and apologise then you need to set out what would make you feel better or safer in the situation.

If they want to make up for the situation they will be.mofe than willing to do this and try make things work.

I hope you manage to resolve the situation and I am sorry it has caused you a lot of frustration and worry. I haven't faced the same situation as this but I have had to have discussions with my partner to resolve conflicts and it is difficult.
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VirgoGirl
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Re: I’m so furious right now.

Post by VirgoGirl »

I'm sorry about this and that you're friends are going through a tough time currently as well. I would have had a meltdown. It's very irresponsible and insensitive. I'm not offering you any advice though as you would have sdked for it if you wanted it. I assume you just needed to pack out and have someome to listen and not feel like you're alone. Well, you're not! We're here to listen. Rant away! Cause you deserve to....what he did here is very bad!!
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Silo
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Re: I’m so furious right now.

Post by Silo »

To be honest..."I couldn't get to my phone in my pocket" is a really terrible excuse. You're how old and you don't know how pockets work? Should you even trusted on your own if you can't manage a pocket?

No offense meant, but that's just such a bad lie, and it doesn't make him look good.

At least he has the good sense to understand he messed up and stay out of your line of sight. It is not a fun experience to try to not be able to get ahold of your spouse (how did people manage before cell phones?).
Lilianna
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Re: I’m so furious right now.

Post by Lilianna »

I'm sorry, all I can do is commiserate. I spend a good chunk of each day managing my kids' dad so he actually gets things done, and he will take any excuse to just lie around and play video games, it's awful.
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