Exploring couples?

[420spyjen!]

So I am single several years now. I have been intrigued at exploring a friendship with a couple. Seems like me being the single one, its a safer venue because I don't have to worry about 'feelings' or strings. I assume, if the couple is stable, they are in it for the fun because they are the ones that share the 'relationship', not trying to have actual feelings with anyone, hence why I wouldn't 'date' a woman when I am not even sure about it. Has anyone else explored this? Was it worth it?
'"

[delevigne-fan]

I just came here to post this video, I didn’t need to my own thread so this was a good coincidence!

I haven’t done it yet but I’m considering it and chatting to bi women online. I have experience with women but not in any kind of trio. I’m part of an existing duo with a heterosexual man.

There’s a lot to consider from all angles.

Are you looking to be in a relationship with a couple or a one-off?

Myself I’m not seeking to date as a couple at this stage - or in fact date a woman.

I’m more seeking a friends with benefits dynamic - if it lead to that or something that only occurred as even a one time thing if that’s how it occurred.

I’ve read a lot online (plenty of info in Google), but as yet no experience of any trio situation.

I’ve moved beyond exploring with women alone. I know I’m bisexual or mainly heteroflexible. However, I don’t want to pursue female/female liaisons anymore as I’ve had the experience and now want to incorporate a male partner as that’s the type of bisexual dynamic I’d prefer from here on.

Some may try and talk you out of threesomes, dating a couple etc etc, pursuing forms of ethical non-monogamy.

Some may try and talk you out of the form of bisexuality that incorporates dating different genders that are not women/women exclusive committed long-term relationships. (This could be bisexual erasure in some circumstances!)

I strongly disagree with the above. If you are consenting an adult, you can pursue any form of relationships that you wish with any gender.

You may end up in an exclusive women/women dating relationship at some point and that’s up to you, but don’t feel pressured into any situation with anyone of any gender. It’s your decision - not the decision of other members of any other community- be they be bisexual, gay or straight or any other identity.

Finally be aware of men on dating apps on sites. Some do pretend to be women or a couple with a bi woman. It’s a real thing. Ive had two such experiences. It’s ok to block or unmatch!
Meet any women or couples in a public place etc etc standard precautions with online dating.

Sometimes single women go to swingers clubs too … but that’s something I’m sure there’s info out there on too if you look.

Have fun!

[420spyjen!]

Thank you, and I agree. I do worry a little bit, but I would only meet in a public place, plus confirm its actually a real couple before even meeting.

[delevigne-fan]

Totally check them out beforehand - a phone call or a video call.

Or even a coffee meetup first where you take your own transport - leave separately. You can agree to future plans later. (If you want! Or you can proceed to intimacy straight up if you’re confident it’s a couple! It’s up to you)

I totally noped on a single woman wanting me to have sex with her on the first meeting the other day. I thought this was crazy. I’m sure she was a female but I didn’t like the speed or expectation.

Treat it like you would meeting any other individual.

[moonbynight]

In theory, I'm open to the idea of a couple under the right circumstances.

In practice... I've met very few couples where I was enough into both of them to even consider it.

I'm mostly open to a situation where it developed naturally, rather than apps. I feel like most couples on apps have questionable motivation.

I also don't think I'm interested in dating both partners equally - I am really not interested in actively being in a relationship with a man at this time. But I kind of like the idea of including a man on occasion, as long as he wasn't entitled or otherwise a jerk about it.

[delevigne-fan]

In theory, I'm open to the idea of a couple under the right circumstances.

In practice... I've met very few couples where I was enough into both of them to even consider it.

I'm mostly open to a situation where it developed naturally, rather than apps. I feel like most couples on apps have questionable motivation.

I also don't think I'm interested in dating both partners equally - I am really not interested in actively being in a relationship with a man at this time. But I kind of like the idea of including a man on occasion, as long as he wasn't entitled or otherwise a jerk about it.

I joined an app called Feeld yesterday and I’m already suffering from male overload fatigue.

10 couples with pics of a man and a woman who is stated bi, pan or bi curious woman contacted me just yesterday.

Almost all are men chatting.

One is calling his wife “wifey”. It feels like a stereotypical patriarchy has entered the building.
I want to chat to bi women who are contacting me for her own reasons.

Not silent, disempowered women who feel like it’s a coerced or reluctant act to contact another bi woman.

I think I’m over thinking it. But I’m struck by the lack of women speaking for themselves.

[delevigne-fan]

I guess that’s another trap.

A couple … is the women only doing it cos a guy wants it?

[moonbynight]

There are couples where the woman is only doing it because the guy wants it.

There are also couples where the woman really does want experience with women, but the only way the man will let her is if he's included as well.

Neither of those is a dynamic I feel like being involved in.

There are legit couples out there, but those two situations seem awfully common.

[delevigne-fan]

Oh yes. My mind has a real aversion to men speaking for women or controlling a woman.

I told one of the guys. She needs to chat to me. I don’t even know if she’s interested in me, little alone women at all. if she has no voice, how do I know that if she’s not totally disempowered or controlled? And I don’t want to be the conduit for that type of environment to be a thing for a guy to have dominion over a woman. This sounds over the top, but it’s what my feeling is. No man has ever spoken for me and I have acted out my own bisexual attractions without a man being the reason for it.

She needs to speak (or any other woman) for her own good wants and desires.

I have constructed my own profiles. If in fact it’s actually me driving the possibility of involvement of mobile partner with females or a couple. He’s on board but he’s not even involved in any part of the selection process. It is a completely different situation to what I am encountering on the apps. I am wondering what steps I should take next I don’t feel with men controlling women.

If these women are not actually interested in women, I don’t think it will do anything for them to be involved in sexual activity or anything else with another woman or any other gender for that matter if she has no attraction for it or the people involved if a man has engineered her interactions with other people so to speak

[delevigne-fan]

Also my post above has some obvious errors in it. That’s because I am using my iphone to type with voice recognition and the spelling and words are not quite right. “Mobile” should not be in there for example. I’m hoping you will get the gist of what I mean I guess