What has Shys done for you?

Just realized you're bi? Unsure if you're bi, pan, or lesbian? Questioning your gender? Talk about your thoughts and feelings here.
delevigne-fan
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by delevigne-fan »

moonbynight wrote: Fri Apr 28, 2023 1:23 pm The reality is she kept that site going, at least partially at her own expense (and the expenses she posted at one point were significant), for 15-20 years (I'm a little unclear if the first incarnation of the site on Internet Archive, from 2003, is the same owner). If she'd dropped out at the point where she personally lost most interest, I'm not sure any of us would have found it in the first place.

She totally could have handled things better, and I hope to do so. But I cannot promise I will be willing or able to be actively involved forever and ever myself.
Yes!

One of the mods would aggressively push me to date females in inbox, as she couldn’t understand “heteroflexible”. It was wrong approach to impose on a troubled bi femme. She told me I was the only bisexual on the site as I liked men and women and everyone else was a lesbian. Of course this was rubbish. But I was pretty troubled. What an awful thing to do.

I
delevigne-fan
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by delevigne-fan »

Was l really that bad? I still don’t date women.

I’m open to friendship that includes a sexual element but I still prefer men.

It’s never changed.
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moonbynight
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by moonbynight »

I don't really care how people identify, as long as they're respectful of the purpose of the site and contributing in a positive manner. Bi is a pretty big umbrella, and sexuality is a subject where a lot of people have confusion and uncertainty. Everyone from "I always thought I was totally straight but I think I might have a little crush on my BFF" to "I've always thought I was bi but now wondering if I'm actually a lesbian" is welcome.
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satehen
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by satehen »

It was 2002 when I first joined, I was 21 and only just realising that I was attracted to women as well as men. There were a lot of realisations that year! I joined shys after googling bicurious and found thousands of other women at various stages of their bisexual journey. Shys helped me to understand myself and make sense of all the confusion. I met some amazing women on the meets, I’m still real life friends with Charlie (Nikita), Tara (Cutiebi) and Sarah (forgot her username).
And all that there is, is the absolute ugliness of being human. And you’ve got to love it. Or else you’re f**ked.
Bisue
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by Bisue »

The original shybi was the first place that I acknowledged my bisexuality. I met someone, had a brief relationship with someone I met in here, but primarily shybi gave me a safe community to discuss all manner of things. I’ve missed it since the site went down and I’m very glad to have found this.
Bookworm
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by Bookworm »

delevigne-fan wrote: Wed May 03, 2023 9:26 am
moonbynight wrote: Fri Apr 28, 2023 1:23 pm The reality is she kept that site going, at least partially at her own expense (and the expenses she posted at one point were significant), for 15-20 years (I'm a little unclear if the first incarnation of the site on Internet Archive, from 2003, is the same owner). If she'd dropped out at the point where she personally lost most interest, I'm not sure any of us would have found it in the first place.

She totally could have handled things better, and I hope to do so. But I cannot promise I will be willing or able to be actively involved forever and ever myself.
Yes!

One of the mods would aggressively push me to date females in inbox, as she couldn’t understand “heteroflexible”. It was wrong approach to impose on a troubled bi femme. She told me I was the only bisexual on the site as I liked men and women and everyone else was a lesbian. Of course this was rubbish. But I was pretty troubled. What an awful thing to do.

I

Definitely the wrong approach! Not to mention really odd and over invested too.
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moonbynight
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by moonbynight »

Also funny because I suspect @delevigne-fan has more actual experience with women than many on the site 😂
delevigne-fan
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by delevigne-fan »

moonbynight wrote: Tue May 09, 2023 6:52 pm Also funny because I suspect @delevigne-fan has more actual experience with women than many on the site 😂
Apparently! Despite the odds.

I’m probably now most experienced with Netflix and Amazon Prime etc than women (range - Bollywood films, music - Shania Twain, Timberlake, Fleetwood Mac, McCartney, Taylor Swift), reality (dating shows!), world politics, documentaries on poverty in various nations, Ukraine, Sudan etc.

For bi relevant content I’ve found some on polyamory on Netflix too:
You Me Her - a Seattle married couple begin a relationship with a college student. The two women are bisexual. I think later the wife leaves and starts a relationship with a separate woman outside the trio.

Dating Around - a reality dating show. On the USA version watch for Deva’s episode, she dates men and women. (It’s Deva Mahal, who’s a musician and daughter of famous musician Taj Mahal - he’s in Wikipedia - legend.)

On the Brazilian version watch for Raissa or Raisa (unsure of spelling)in Sao Paulo. If you can’t speak Portuguese, put on the subtitles.
She mostly only meets lesbian women, but one she meets (and develops a relationship with) is a bisexual woman.
The bisexual woman wasn’t sure if the person the show sent her to meet was going to be a man or woman.
Raissa kisses all the women passionately. It seems as though she’d date any of them further as she likes all!

Finally… try Dating Around Latino (English dialogue can be set instead of subtitles). Lots of single men and women from all over Latin America come to become couples etc in a silly concept show. Most of the women state they are bisexual and are very beautiful. Some women kiss on screen. Most couples end up as male-female.
The bisexual cast members (like the others) state they enjoy sex with anyone (male or female).
While this show shows no nudity, it’s not suitable for young kids, sex is talked about and implied with characters shown moving around in bed in the dark.

What has any of this got to do with the topic - absolutely nothing! But I gained more info and bi entertainment there than ever. And it’s certainly more useful than the messages I got on the old shybi.
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Orla
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by Orla »

delevigne-fan wrote: Tue May 09, 2023 7:30 pm
moonbynight wrote: Tue May 09, 2023 6:52 pm Also funny because I suspect @delevigne-fan has more actual experience with women than many on the site 😂

I’m probably now most experienced with Netflix and Amazon Prime etc than women (range - Bollywood films, music - Shania Twain, Timberlake, Fleetwood Mac, McCartney, Taylor Swift), reality (dating shows!), world politics, documentaries on poverty in various nations, Ukraine, Sudan etc.
I’m going to need to know your favorite Taylor Swift songs! I’ll start a thread with mine. Same goes for the rest of you—I need to know this info. If you think you don’t have a favorite TS song, you probably do, trust me. Maybe you just haven’t heard it yet. I didn’t become a fan until 2020.


But with regards to other bi/queer content, one of my favorite books is having an unexpected hot moment due to some random hype on Twitter that went viral (the book is four years old but it’s now at #15 on Amazon). The title is This Is How You Lose The Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone. If you like fantasy or sci-fi, the enemies to lovers trope, or stories told through letters, read this, I’m so serious. Or listen to it. I’ve done both. It is very short as well (officially a novella). I read it three years ago and it had me by the throat. It’s incredibly beautiful and I’ll never forget it.

Since enm/poly was mentioned, Many Love by Sophie Lucido Johnson is a memoir about one person’s experience with poly and dating men and women.

TV-

Ted Lasso, now with wlw rep!

Andor- I’m really sorry that I can’t and won’t shut up about Andor (I’m worse in discord though). But yes, it has wlw content and they don’t just infer it, either. I’ll take this opportunity and add that a good amount of Star Wars books and comics are so non-heterosexual and Andor is the tip of the iceberg. If you don’t know where or how to get started watching or reading SW, I’m here for you.

A League of Their Own (Amazon Prime) is profoundly gay (admiring).

Broad City- wlw in case you didn’t know. The seasons have concluded and I believe it’s available on HBO and likely other platforms as well.
delevigne-fan
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Re: What has Shys done for you?

Post by delevigne-fan »

That said my reply read like I only watch bisexual tv drama or reality shows. Lol - not at all. Today I watched a documentary on Palestinians being forced to escape from Gaza and go into the desert to work in Israel as the soldiers destroyed their village
Fighting for democracy in Myanmar and Thailand
Lots of news coverage on the latest in Sudan, Pakistan and Israel

All on Al Jazeera. I recommend it.

On Netflix I saw
https://www.netflix.com/us/title/811545 ... p=81370741

Magical Andes…

I think I’d go crazy if I only watched things based on bi stuff. Too narrow - there’s a lot of issues to be aware of.
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