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Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Sat Aug 19, 2023 11:02 pm
by HarleyMama
I was involved in a threesome and the female and I slowly started having feelings for each other. Extremely attracted to her but her craziness kept me at bay. And I should say she would go batshit crazy on me, especially after some drinks. Met my current boyfriend and she couldn’t understand how I could start falling for him. Was 100% honest how I am sexually attracted to men but also crave the touch of a woman. Months later, I told her that I was falling in love with her but also was falling for him. She told me I was nuts and that’s not possible. Has anyone else ever had strong feelings for both sexes at the same time?

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Sun Aug 20, 2023 4:05 am
by MarieGreen
I don't think the different sexes is relevant, or wouldn't be to me. I think the question is whether you can love two people at once. I think some people can. I'm not sure I could.

I'm not sure you love her though if you describe her as "bat shit crazy". The way you write about her feels like you are attracted to her but at least for me, that's not love.

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Sun Aug 20, 2023 6:43 am
by VirgoGirl
I'm married but also in a serious online relationship with a woman for over 2 years now. I love them both....differently, but i truly deeply love them. It can happen.

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Sun Aug 20, 2023 3:06 pm
by Orla
Yes

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Wed Aug 23, 2023 4:00 pm
by lousund
I'm guessing it's possible but have no personal experience of this.

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Wed Aug 23, 2023 5:05 pm
by letsbefriends1st
It is possible to love both a man and a woman I believe because each of them bring something different to the table, but yet am sure they also share some similar qualities that you find attractive. Is it possible? Yes—but can also be very complicated 😢

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Tue Aug 29, 2023 8:49 am
by GinTonic
Of course its possible

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Tue Aug 29, 2023 6:13 pm
by moonbynight
MarieGreen wrote: Sun Aug 20, 2023 4:05 am I don't think the different sexes is relevant, or wouldn't be to me. I think the question is whether you can love two people at once. I think some people can. I'm not sure I could.
I agree with this - it's about the ability to love more than one person at the same time, not gender. If you can love more than one person at the same time, then it makes sense that you could love both a man and a woman, or two women, or any other possible combination of genders.

The comparison I most often see in polyamory circles is how a parent can love more than one child. No one questions this. You might appreciate different things about each child or have a different sort of relationship with each, but most people recognize that you can genuinely love all of them and not necessarily have a favorite.

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Tue Aug 29, 2023 11:35 pm
by Mintcake
I have yet to experience being in love with any one person, male or female. So to love both at the same time is beyond my imagination at this moment in time!
That's not to say I won't at some point in the future!

Re: Can you love a man and woman at the same time?

Posted: Wed Aug 30, 2023 4:26 am
by MarieGreen
moonbynight wrote: Tue Aug 29, 2023 6:13 pm The comparison I most often see in polyamory circles is how a parent can love more than one child. No one questions this. You might appreciate different things about each child or have a different sort of relationship with each, but most people recognize that you can genuinely love all of them and not necessarily have a favorite.
Now that is interesting. I only have one child so there is no competition but I'm one of three and my parents do have favourites. I've seen it in ex partners with siblings too and friends. I suspect parents having favourites is actually pretty common.